I can't help myself.

Did you know that there's a McDonald's by the Dallas Zoo? And did you know that it's zoo-themed? BECAUSE IT IS AND IT KEEPS MAKING TERRIFYING ANIMALS NOISES AT ME WHILE I'M TRYING TO GET SOME WORK DONE. This is worse than the obnoxious teenagers. I think I've had 17 heart attacks since I've been here. Thus, blogging, because I can't concentrate on anything important.

By the way, the only reason that the original Pure Country owned (and let's be clear here, it NEVER owned, not even in an old-timey historical sense where it owned slaves, which would actually make sense in a country movie, although I guess not anymore since black people make country music [I'M LOOKING AT YOU DARIUS RUCKER], which kind of upsets me because country music was all crazy racism [that's crazism, for those of you playing at home], and now black people are like "yeah, that's cool, but me singing with a weird twang is even cooler" or something? anyway, the point being that Pure Country does not, and will never OWN in any awesome sense of the word) was because of Leslie Ann Warren.

Ah, Leslie Ann Warren. You are my favorite cray cray lay day. To wit:
- Clue
- Secretary
- Sydney Pollock's crazy mistress on Will & Grace

Those are just off the top of my head. Apparently she was naked a lot and kissed ladies in some older movies, like No Way Out with Kevin Costner, when Kevin Costner was awesome. Remember that? MAN. I miss awesome Kevin Costner. He should write a movie - no, wait, scratch that FOREVER - he should be in a movie with Leslie Ann Warren. I would watch the shit out of that. And then I would somehow age 15 years whilst watching it. [edit: Turns out the movie I was thinking of was Color of Night, with Bruce Willis. And he still KINDA has a career. So I feel stupid. But I would still watch a movie with the two of them. And it would OWN, unlike stupid stupid waste-of-time Pure Country.]

But it would be worth it. I think. I hope. I PRAY.

So you get Leslie Ann Warren in Pure Country 2, and I'll be there in my hair. Which I will style all Texas-big, because the only thing I know about country music is stereotypes.

(I am embarrassed that I have written 2 blogs ostensibly about Pure Country and its ilk. But I just used the words "ostensibly" and "ilk," so that makes me feel better.)